Seltzerlizard

I’m going to try, from now on, to ask myself a question mentally directed at whoever is trying to sell me anything, from a product to an idea to a candidate: What is the shittiest version of what you’re trying to get me to buy?  During the sales pitch, everything works, systems always work exactly as they’re planned, nothing breaks, and everyone is happy.  It’s afterwards, when it’s too late, that things snap in two, replacement parts aren’t made for that either anymore or ever, the CEO got an extra 100 million dollar bonus for showing up to a few board meetings, war has taken over the planet, and there are five year-old kids begging for cleaner garbage to pick through for something to eat.